Mixtape (2025)

This "game" is about 3 losers who don't understand that they are losers wrapped in 90s stereotypes. You're better off to listen to the soundtrack, which is the real point of the game, on YouTube than play this. This is a vanity project for Johnny Galvatron (yes, that's the director and writer's name) and his musical preferences and snobbery. Save your money. Only play this if you're going to share in its mockery.

As the Any% World Record holder, do not buy this trash at full price. Do not buy it on sale. If someone gifts it to you, they hate you, and wish you to feel physical pain. This is a game by only the broadest of definitions. Of the 2hrs 2mins completion time, a full 1hr 49mins are either cutscenes, or stretches of slowly sinking your way to the bottom of a funnel you cannot escape from. The gameplay that exists, in it's totality, is as follows: Skipping stones, hitting baseballs from an auto pitcher, taking pictures at an amusement park (far less exciting than it sounds), painting a door, moving a couch, sweeping, and shooting ten stationary targets with a slingshot. Surely, you say, the narrative must be top notch then, hey? How wrong you are. The characters are three braindead, hipster-posing, druggies with the most sever case of arrested development I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing. There is no end to their inane drivel. The main character, Stacy equal parts insufferable and pretentious. She constantly spews out ♥♥♥♥♥♥ opinions, as her band of gaggle-♥♥♥♥♥ wonder in awe at her. Slater, is a worthless soy boy who is the arbiter of what is and is not 'metal'. He enjoys making ear rape for no one to enjoy, and doing whatever the other two demand of him, from the comfort of his cuck chair. And finally, the absolute psychopath, Cassandra. The ♥♥♥♥♥ gets mad that her cop father won't let her do crime, smoke weed and drink at parties with pedophilic college students. And for this, she threatens arson while standing in front of a wildfire she and her friends were responsible for and warning her character assassinated father that there is more where that came from if he doesn't agree to approve of her delinquency. That leaves us with the titular mixtape. The magnum opus of the dent head brainlette, who's life's ambition is to be a Music Supervisor. It's mid as ♥♥♥♥. The end. 2/10

This game is what people who hate Life is Strange think Life is Strange is Fantastic art. Horrendous writing and theming.